CC Stands For Cut And Chiseled

Celebrate the change, fellas.

Jim Rome
May 13, 2020 - 9:21 am
CC Sabathia

USA Today

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The Tyson and Holyfield vids aren’t the only shocking things that have surfaced on social media recently. Have you seen the pic of CC Sabathia? I mean it, have you seen the photo of CC Sabathia?

You know, the legendary pitcher, the Cy Young Winner, the World Series champion, the member of the 3,000 strikeout club, the future Hall of Famer, who you all mocked for a long time because of his physique.

All you geniuses thought it was hilarious to change CC from Carsten Charles to Cap’n Crunch or Commander Chimichanga. Corona Chugging. Cake Chomping. Croissant Chowing. Calorie Consuming. Candy Cramming. Really high level stuff. Just remarkable creativity and brilliance.

Because when you looked at Sabathia, you dopes refused to see excellence on the mound and focused on what he was doing on his plate. You didn’t see a guy who teammates loved, an ace who loved the game, a man who battled some serious challenges away from the field, and a guy who would give you everything he had every time out.

All you saw was a lame joke and an easy laugh. Just hop online, look up foods beginning with the letter “c,” scan that list and reject anything that might sound healthy, like celery or cabbage and go straight to Coconut Cream. Thumb out tweet. Hit send. And sit back to wait for the hilarity to ensue.

And of course you’re all doing that between sets of high intensity training or intervals on a versaclimber, you know, because all you clowns are in crazy shape, so you can make fun of a guy who’s not. Of course you aren’t.

I’ve said in the past that when every single one of you gets into sick shape and are rocking eight packs, then you can start making fun of other people for their personal appearance, but how about we skip that part? How about you just stop the personal appearance crap once and for all?

And here’s the thing you all missed about Sabathia’s physique when he played: it worked. He has more than 250 wins and 3,000 strikeouts. There are 14 guys in the history of the game in that club, and he’s one of them.

There are a ton of guys who could be shirtless on the cover of Men’s Health who never even sniffed 25 wins, let alone 250.

So you tell me, if you’re drafting a team, do you want some crazy, yoked pitcher with body fat percentage under four or do you want a guy who’ll give you 34 starts with an ERA under four? Do you want a jeans model or do you want a pitcher? Because CC Sabathia was a pitcher. And a damn good one.

And now all of you idiots who have been clowning him as Colonel Cheesecake have to shut your cavernous cakeholes. 

Because, now you all are done. Because all your Cinnabon Connoisseur jokes have to be retired. Because now that CC Sabathia is retired, CC Sabathia is shredded. Yeah I said it. Absolutely jacked.

To the point that the immediate reaction of most people was, is that a photoshop? Like, that can’t be real.

But Ryan Ruocco, who does a podcast with Sabathia, tweeted that it’s legit: Not Photoshopped. The big fella has been getting after it during quarantine!

He sure as hell has. CC is not going the MJ route in retirement. He’s leaning out and getting shredded. And I totally respect it. I’m always fascinated to see what athletes do in retirement when it comes to working out. Do they continue to hit it hard? Is the working out a permanent lifestyle or do they do the Jordan move of hit the cigars and booze, and enjoy the good life?

From the looks of it, CC is enjoying the clean living life. CC stands for cut and chiseled. CC has been working the concentration curls, because those guns are serious.

It is so impressive. Because so many guys get to the end of their playing careers and never see the inside of a gym ever again. CC looks like he’s never left the gym. He threw his last MLB pitch in October and from the looks of it, sprinted to a Gold’s Gym and locked himself inside.

Because less than seven months later, he looks like a new man. I am blown away. And inspired. That really is awesome. I’m celebrating that. Develop the body you want and the life you want to live in retirement. That is the best. And if you’re taking a run at him for that, you’re just jealous.  

And no, there is absolutely no reason to bash him for getting this rocked in retirement. That is legitimately the dumbest criticism ever. During his time in New York, he had been dealing with a knee injury and some other health problems near the end of his career.

And there is no guarantee that being ripped during his career would’ve made him a better pitcher. There have been plenty of damn good pitchers who weren’t exactly body builders. Again, look at his numbers. His career totals are up there with some of the greats.

Celebrate the change. And maybe use it as some inspiration for yourself. If he can attack retired life and the quarantine life like that, maybe you can too.