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It's Rascal Flatts, Clones

If you want to talk hockey, I'll talk hockey.

April 13, 2018 - 12:23 pm

If you want to talk hockey, I'll talk hockey. YOU won’t a find a nationally syndicated program that does a better of doing that: of respecting and appreciating the NHL. I love the product. And I’m on record as saying the NHL postseason is the BEST postseason.  So you want to talk hockey, let’s talk hockey. But I'm not going to talk about "RASCAL FATS." I don't care that those dudes look like they MAY HAVE chunked up a little bit since the last time we saw them open up a Preds Playoff Game. 

Hell, you want to talk country music, it’s not where I live, but I’ll even do that. You want to talk about their 17 #1 singles? Fine. The almost 24 million albums they've sold, cool with me. Just don't expect me to engage in the same, tired, juvenile rhetoric that comes any time you alleged four percent body fatters, see a couple guys who look like they loosened the belt, unbuttoned the denim, and then dropped into some spandex hockey jerseys. 

They weren't THAT tight. Maybe they're actual authentic gamers, have you ever thought about that? Made from that new material that everybody's wearing so it's harder to hook or hold onto?

Or maybe, maybe they come off the rails last weekend, like many of us do and maybe they gained a pound or two. What the hell do you care? Why does it even matter? Talk about their incredible vocal range. Not the brick of free range bacon you insist they inhaled before belting out that anthem. 

This is NOT going to be a thing all playoffs. And it's not an invitation to try and tell me that DANE COOK is going to sing before Game 2. Or Belly Clarkbar is in the on-deck circle. Adele is not flying on a cargo plane into Nashville to sing before the game. Let me stop this before it starts. 

And it's Rascal FLATTS. FLATTS.