Yasiel Puig

USA Today

McCutchen's Perspective On Baseball Brawls

Much ado about nothing and now finally a player said it.

August 16, 2018 - 12:11 pm

Last night could have been Defcon 1 in Los Angeles if not for Brian Dozier driving in the winning walk-off run in the bottom of the 12th. Because for the sixth game in a row the Dodgers bully absolutely wrecked a game for the squad—this time by a gagging a 3-0 lead in the 8th. And there wasn’t anyone from the 818 to the 949 who thought the Dodgers were gonna duck that broom the Giants were trying to crack over their skulls. But they did. And the losing streak is over. Not before the 'pen eviscerated another lead and not before the Dodgers finished the series without the top spot in the NL West. But it’s over.

What’s not over? Takes on that scrap Yasiel Puig started in Game 2 back on Tuesday. If you missed it, Puig sparked a benches clearing brawl—if you can call it brawl—after he and Nick Hundley got into it behind the plate. 

So why the hell am I doubling back to something that happened on Tuesday? Because Andrew McCutchen went on Instagram yesterday and laid the whole thing out from his perspective after I got off the air. And his point-of-view from the outfield is definitely worth hearing because it’s hilarious. Check this dude.

There’s so much to love about that. And if social media is terrible for so many reasons—it’s awesome for this. Awesome because mccutchen can just roll tape in his hotel and mass blast out his take on that scrap from Tuesday night. And who the hell didn’t want to hear that?

That’s a 10-year vet just straight clowning. I love that part where he said, “By the time I got there we was all just chilling, staring at each other. I thought about brightening the mood by getting in a karate pose. But I didn’t do it. And that was it. That’s basically most brawls. For outfielders anyway.

For outfielders? You mean for everyone, Cutch. Rarely do these things pop off as anything memorable. Rarely does Pedro chuck an old man to the ground by his head. Rarely does Nolan Ryan put Robin Ventura into a buzzsaw. Rarely does a middle infielder cold cock Joey Bats into the 300 level.

It’s usually just a hug fest with a bunch of “hold-me-back!” Bros yelling, “You wanna go!” One thing for me to say that from this chair behind this mic. Entirely another for a major league outfielder talking about wanting to strike up karate poses to lighten the mood. Shows you how concerned Cutch is with what they things might become.

Give me the days of Carlos Zambrano taking off his belt. Or that red ass A.J. Pierzynski getting leveled by a Michael Barrett haymaker.

Or don’t give me anything at all. If you’re just coming out to hug and yell and be held back—then save McCutchen the jog. Because like he said—you just run out to get tired. Everyone’s already wet. Everyone’ had their cake. And Cutch is just sucking air. And he probably speaks for everyone who gets their two seconds too late.

Much ado about nothing and now finally a player said it. Here’s to moving Cutch to first base to so he can finally get in there with some karate moves.