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Merry Stoner Christmas, Heads

The greenest, dankest, laziest, and hungriest day of the year is finally here! 4-20!

April 20, 2018 - 11:56 am

The greenest, dankest, laziest, and hungriest day of the year is finally here! 4-20! The highest of high holidays. A day when heads worldwide celebrate a life dedicated to smoking weed by… get this—smoking weed!

How very ambitious of you stoners! Normally a holiday is noteworthy for all the reasons it’s not like every other day. That’s not the case with 4-20. Shockingly 4-20 is a just a bunch of heads being heads. Imagine Gym Guy rolling up on the world telling us he’s gonna get a lift in today. Or Golf Guy proudly declaring he’s pulling the bats from the trunk this afternoon. Or Softball Guy leaning in and disclosing plans to explode a hammy stretching a bloop single into a selfish double.

We know Gym Guy pumps, we know Golf Guy swings, and we know Softball Guy gets wrecked reliving high school glory days. But stoners, for some hilarious reason, are hell-bent on reminding the world that they smoke. 

I’m not here to crack it. I’m not here to condone it, either—but I’m not here to crack it. This time last year Washington and Colorado were the only two states to have bud totally legalized. Now eight different states and D.C. are totally down with the recreational use of the hippy lettuce, too. On top of that, 18 other states say it’s cool—if you go through a doctor. And a total of 46 U.S. states allow the chron in some capacity or another.

Team Bake is winning the War on the Chron. In a greenslide. Hell, Mike Tyson is opening up Stoner Disneyland and Ricky Williams has a shop in San Diego. It’s a head’s world and we’re all just living in it.

So Team Bake: This is your bat signal. Not only is it 4-20, but it’s Friday. And not only is it Friday, it’s pay day. Everything is lining up.

If you can do it responsibly, get in here, and let me know how you’re celebrating. Are you doing dabs? Are crushing gummies? Or are you keeping it old school and just blowing trees?

And for those of you wondering why I'm shouting out Team Bake--I’ll tell you: Because Team Bake has had my back for decades. Team Bake is a huge part of this show. No different than why I shout out Pool Tech Guy Nation, or Lady Clones, or the dudes driving delivery trucks all day. Hell, have you heard the love for outside sales on this show? Team Bake just happens to have its own a day, and because of that--and they're loyalty--they get a little run here.

Merry Stoner Christmas, Heads. If the Masters is a traditional unlike any other—than 4-20 is a day just like every other.