Urban Meyer

USA Today

Urb’s Back

Great coach, garbage human.

September 18, 2018 - 1:06 pm

Urban Meyer – now there’s a guy I never want to talk about or hear from ever again. What a sack of garbage.

But he’s coming back to coach football, so he decided that he wanted to try to rehab his image and do a sit-down interview with Tom Rinaldi and then a press conference yesterday. And they both went about as well as you can imagine. 

I could do a line-by-line breakdown of what he’s said recently and get into the weeds about what he claims he didn’t know, when there is evidence to the contrary, but why bother? The man is a liar. 

He lies. That’s what he does. And then calls them “misstatements,” like the repeated denials of the 2015 incident at Big Ten Media Days. And then, blames those “misstatements” on not being prepared for the questions and this gem: “I didn’t listen closely to the questions.” And when all else fails, he blames his lies, errrr, memory issues, on medication that he’s taking. Amazing. 

So I’m not going to bother getting into his lame-ass claim that he never deleted text messages from his phone. And that the only reason why those text messages weren’t there was because his phone “started to lock up throughout the spring. The IT person would take my phone, and whatever he did, he did, to increase the storage capacity. And I found out several months ago, I think late spring is when I was told, is that he changed my setting to one year.”

And in case you were wondering, the storage issue with his phone was because he has “hundreds of videos of my grandson and other family videos.”

Uh-huh. So when the school’s own investigation reported that you had a conversation with a staff member about messages on your phone on August 1st, that was made up. According to Urban, it was.

And I’m not going to get into his repeated claim that in all his dealings with Zach Smith, he was trying to help Zach Smith. He was trying to do a good thing, not cover up a bad thing.

That tells you everything you need to know about what Urban Meyer thinks about this whole thing. Urban Meyer thinks the problem in this entire situation was that Urban Meyer was trying to be too good. The problem wasn’t that I was covering up for a piece of crap on my staff, it’s that I was trying to be a saint.

And that’s all you need to know. That after being suspended for three games, having repeated attempts at press conferences, interviews, and Twitter statements, Urban Meyer still thinks he’s the victim. Urban Meyer still thinks he’s the good guy. And the only person who could possibly believe that is Urban Meyer.

He is a liar. The only thing this attempted rehab tour has proven is that he’s a liar and still has no idea what time it is. He is such a sack of crap and this attempt to rehab his image is ridiculous and insulting, and nobody should believe anything he says.

You shouldn’t believe that Twitter statement that included this: “I sincerely regret my misstatement at Media Days, and my failure to adequately manage a troubled employee. It caused people to question my commitment to our core value of Treating Women with Respect. And it caused them to question my honesty.” 

Here’s the thing: when you lie, people will think you’re a liar. When you lie and call them “misstatements,” they’ll know you’re a liar. And when you lie about your knowledge of allegations involving domestic violence and repeatedly show no understanding of domestic violence, people will know that you’re lying about your core vale of treating women with respect. 

So do me a favor. Shut up. 99.9 percent of head coaches get fired for what happened on your watch. You got suspended. You got over. You get to coach football. So do that. Coach football and shut up about everything else. You can talk about football because you’re a football coach, but don’t ever  talk to anyone about being a leader, or morality, or caring for women, or anything like that.

Because you have no standing in that area at all. You’re a football coach and that’s it. The only leading you do is when guys run out of the tunnel after you. That’s it. You’re not a molder of men. You’re not a role model. You forfeited all of that. Just talk about your running game and your offensive scheme, because that’s clearly the only thing you care about. So just take your money, coach your games, and never talk to us again about anything else. Great coach, garbage human.